It may seem improbable that a country so big could produce a set of social norms that are followed by most people, but there are certain traits and habits that a lot of (of course, not all) Brazilians share, as in any nation or culture.
Having spent years around Brazilians, I thought I’d share my observations of some of the most commonly shared traits!
1) Don’t expect to hear “no” to a request or invitation
Brazilians will rarely say “no” to anything as they are incredibly polite and they find it rude to respond in such a way. This means that you will need to listen hard for subtext over the words a Brazilian says. This is especially true when you suspect that a Brazilian is trying to break bad news to you, as they’ll find it really hard to do so.
Saci in Cidade Invisível gives a hilarious display of this to break the news to Camila that she can’t stay with him any longer. I highly recommend the series Cidade Invisível a great watch and a cool learning tool. Learn more in my 4 must watch Brazilian series post.
2) Add at least 30 minutes onto any arrangement with a Brazilian
And up to 40 minutes to an hour… Brazilian and British perspectives on time are wildly different; Brazilians are very polite people and they don’t like to disappoint, so can be a bit foggy about their punctuality:
3) Don’t use British excuses to turn down plans with a Brazilian, simply say “a próxima vez!”
We British know that “Sounds great but I have an early meeting in the morning”, “I’d love to but I’m skint at the moment” and other such lines can simply be a polite way to say “I don’t want to” when an invitation is extended.
However, if you use these on Brazilians, they will listen to the first part as though you genuinely would LOVE to go out but circumstances are preventing you, so they will provide solutions like, “I’m not staying late either, let’s just go for a couple of drinks and leave at 21:30” (they’ll leave at midnight), or “Don’t worry, drinks are on me tonight!”.
This can be alarming because if your excuses are explained away, then you’re pretty much obliged to accept. Simply say you can’t tonight, but “a próxima vez!” (“next time”) to avoid this awkward charade.
4) Accept offers to share things and offer to share
Brazilians are incredibly generous people and they are accustomed to sharing whatever they have. Whether it’s splitting a chocolate bar with a friend, asking for another glass to share a bottle of beer when another friend turns up, or even getting sharing plates over individual dishes at a restaurant, Brazilians share everything.
It’s as much about making sure everyone is comfortable and having a good time, as an act of kindness and friendship, so accepting is also a sign of connection.
5) Leave controversial subjects at the door
Brazilians are generally very positive people and whilst they can and will debate controversial topics in closed circles with people they’ve known for a long time, in more open social situations they’ll keep it light. This means that they’ll use a series of short phrases to avoid disagreeing but also to avoid continuing the conversation in a controversial direction, as French comedian Paul Cabannes shows here.
6) If in doubt, wear flip-flops
If you’re unsure what to wear in Brazil, trust that the flip-flop is acceptable footwear for almost any activity. Havaianas controls 80% of the Brazilian rubber slippers market. Unlike in England, where you only really wear flip-flops to the beach, they are the go-to footwear in Brazil for the beach, bars, and even a hike. I did a lot of walking in my recent trip to Rio and was amazed at how many people I saw climbing the huge hills in the city in none other than Havaianas!
7) Don’t assume that repeated references to God are indicative of a Brazilian’s world view
Brazilians references God a lot in every day speech, and whilst for some people it is connected to belief, for others they’re just expressions. It took me to write this list of English equivalents to realise how often I use God in my every day English!
Learning and using lots of these will have you seeming and feeling more Brazilian in no time.
Vai com Deus / Fica com Deus = God be with you
Se Deus quiser = God willing
Meu Deus = my God!
Graças a Deus = thank God
Sabe Deus quando = God knows when
Só deus sabe = God only knows
Deus me livre = Lord give me strength
Santo Deus = Good God
Deus te/nos ajude = God help us
Pelo amor de Deus = For the love of God
8) Expect your expression of difficulties to be met with motivational rhetoric
This one is a very nice one indeed, if what you need is positive reinforcement. Brazilian positivity is a wonderful thing, and if you find yourself in hard times, you’ll likely hear the expression “bola para frente,” which literally means “move the ball forward” (a football reference, of course!). It’s similar to “chin up” in English, and denotes a call to persist and not get distracted by the difficulty surrounding you.
Other common ones are:
Grandes coisas estão por vir = great things are coming
Pra todo fim, um recomeço = every ending is a new beginning
Quando uma porta se fecha, outras se abrem = when one door shuts, others open
Antes só do que mal acompanhado = better alone than in bad company
Quem espera sempre alcança = good things come to those who wait
Final thoughts
If you’re learning Brazilian Portuguese but aren’t yet that familiar with cultural traits that will help you map out interactions with Brazilians, I highly recommend you get to know Paul Cabannes’ comedy, who I mentioned in my Learn Portuguese with Brazilian humour: 3 Brazilian comedy acts you should know about post; he’s a Parisian living in Brazil, and his observations are hilarious!
Are these similar to any traits in your own culture? Are there any you’d like to introduce into your own way of doing things?
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